Total Pussy

Mini chapter for my book - song for this chapter ESTELLE'S AMERICAN BOY

During the 2008 Beached project, I was based in Santa Monica. While I was there I used to hang out in a little internet café 5 minutes stroll from where I lived on Cedar St. Every morning I would pull on a sun-dress and flip flops, grab my bag and head out.

I loved that lazy stroll to the café. The morning sun was just warming the Santa Monica pavements, like squares of bread in a big toaster.

One of the songs I associate with that time is Estelle’s American Boy (featuring Kanye West).

As I sat outside in the glorious Californian sunshine, a group of guys had started to gather round my table while I listened to the tracks and made album edit notes. Bryan was one of them. He was bald, Jewish, and sexy as hell. The heat between us was melting our daily Frappuccinos.

I had 10 days left on my 90 day visa, and I can’t abide men who dither so I texted him on my tiny motorola flip phone: “So, are you coming over, or what?” He must have sprinted, because, I shit you not, 30 seconds later he was banging on my door. Matron.

Darling reader, I fucked his brains out.

A few days later, I went to his apartment. He was holding his cat. I instinctively reached out to hold it, but he moved the cat away. Bryan, a grown man, wouldn’t let me hold his cat.

That’s another lesson I learnt: don’t ever get serious about a man who won’t let you hold his cat.

MORE TO COME…