Abs I heard a joke yesterday it goes as follows,, MRS Brown appears in court and is found guilty of stealing a tin of peaches, The judge asks " Mrs Brown roughly how many peaches were in the tin you stole " Mrs Brown nervously replies 6 peaches I think sir ", The judge responds " I therefore sentence you to 6 weeks imprisonment, 1 week for each peach " Husband Mr Brown shouts from the back row " She nicked a tin of peas as well" 🤣 impressive spring impression Abs it took me back to my sofa bed days😂. Question, Abs living in London have you ever been asked directions by a foreigner and been tempted to respond in your glorious Italiano.
Tom Harwood is the worse example of the younger generation. I really cannot listen to that soy boy.
Let’s hope that YouTube doesn’t take down The Great Wall of Cunts. I really like abirobertscomedydiva, it suits you.
June Slater is now into self promotion and is a Malhotra and Bridgen bootlicker.
An Abi birthday gathering, what a brilliant idea. PLEASE do not organise it between 13-24 June as I will be away on holiday. I don’t want to miss another event!
Bloody hell Abi, for a minute i thought you had kidnapped one of the chimps from nearby twycross zoo while you were down our way at kegworth l🤣🤣 even George the dog went mad barking lol! I find you get the best conversations whilst in the back of a taxi i have certainly been enlightened to some local goings on whilst travelling to work( i do miss that)
Yes poor Charlotte but I think she loves it really and she’s so good at it. I met her at the London comedy thing. I want her as my live-in mate. Just dead normal, cuddly and down to earth. Love her. I turned round and saw Abi at the bar. I dived on her for a hug and wanted to touch her fluffy hair but I think that might’ve been too much 😆
I wish I lived near London. I live in the US. I would love to hang out with this community for an evening. But maybe if it’s in June we have time to renew my passport.
Love a Planet of the Apes especially the new ones. ...the old ones creep me out a bit.
The taxi driver sounds like a belter.....pissing myself at ‘I won’t be using it’.
Alastair Stewart,a nod to Terry on the GWOC....nice.
June Slater......brilliant,loving the ‘you’re off the rails’ what’s app msg I’ve experienced this particular slur and I think it’s code for ‘ you are far smarter,funnier and much braver than me’ ,(well that’s how I translate it) from my padded cell).
Birthday meet up sounds fab....we’ve been talking about it for the full gestation period of GWOC! It’s time we celebrated its birth and your birth Abi 😀
Love to you all....it’s difficult being off the bloody rails and still ‘part’ functioning in society xx
I remember how outspoken lord Sumpton was at the beginning, he came across as a highly principled man and very intelligent and then all of a sudden he sat down and kept his mouth shut. I remember how outspoken Peter Hitchens was, always posting Bob's amazing cartoons saying 'Bob gets it' then he said nothing in defence of Bob when he was hounded out of his job on the telegraph and being vilified on twitter. Hitchens write an article explaining why he took the jabs and was a lot more cautious about what he said afterwards. Neither of those two were consistent and they didn't defend people when it really mattered.
Would love to come to your birthday party Abi and meet everyone in the substack family, that would be wonderful.
Although i love good films, books seem to affect me more than films. My all time favourite is Nicholas Nickleby by Charles Dickens. Its an emotional roller coaster, very moving and all of humanity is in those pages. Compassion, love, cruelty, ignorance and in the end karma. You could relate to it today and at any time.
Your Italian accent is definitely better than your Greek one Abi 😉
Yes I agree lord Sumpon has disappeared. A good book I recommend is The ragged trousered philanthropists iwritten by Robert Tressel t's about builders in early 1890 working on a house of all different trades disgusting wht they don't have enough money to feed there family written in a humorous way.
I remember listening to him early on in the ‘pandemic’ (I can never say that with a straight face 😆) he was doing an interview about how we would all be forced to get jabbed and I felt so despondent. He knew it was wrong and yet said we should comply. Really, really depressed me.
Bob will have to pop along, you can smother him in cake and lick it off... I’ll be hunting out the cheese and pineapple hedgehogs. You think I’m joking 🧀🍍🦔
Great laugh tonight Abi, loved the chimp impressions, I used to act out the PG Tips adverts in full when I was a kid (you’ve got to be old enough to know what what I mean) I loved those monkey and wanted one as a pet 🤣, obviously I loved the Planet of the Apes films too!
I saw The Peoples Princess June Slater on Twitter explaining why she doesn’t go to marches cos London is too far and she’s too busy helping people!!!! I bet she’d be there faster than a speeding bullet if GBeebies invited her to the studio. I’d love a June Slater type character, perhaps she could do an interview with McCockin I’m sure she’d love it!
I’m definitely up for a party Abi, I would love to see you and the substack family in person it would be fab!
Loving the chimping 🐵 im also a huge fan of Planet of the apes. I would love to come to your party and definitely stay over. Would be amazing to meet the substack family x
Wish I could join you all for Abi’s birthday but I’ll be with you in spirit from South Africa. I couldn’t live without Abi’s daily pods - always thought provoking and inspiring.
My friend used to work in an old people’s home when she was 18. There was an old boy called Frank who would always be touching his todger under his blanket. Then he’d fling the blanket off and stand up and shout “finish me off” to the circle of little old ladies. My friend would be traumatised and they’d have staff meetings about what should be done about Frank the wank 😂
😂I had this experience when I was only in my teens working in a nursing home prior to starting my nurse training....I was horrified that men in their 80s were still standing to attention 😱 we had one like that,Ecky was his name,he was wheelchair bound,paralysed down his right side but his little erect walnut seemed to be in good working order,bless him and he’d shout for someone to finish him off,he even asked the Chef in one occasion 😂 I hadn’t seen many willies and I was traumatised 😀🤢
Boys will be boys, unless they are girls obviously!
I’ve had so many experiences with wankers I could write a book. Working for a sexual abuse support service we would often get phone calls from men who loved to phone up and pretend to be victims of abuse then go in to graphic detail of what was obviously a sexual fantasy. We had paid members of staff and volunteers who would work on the telephone helpline and they were told to hang up if these calls came through. I got a call one morning just as I’d opened up the office, I answered the phone immediately in case it was a genuine person needing help I hadn’t taken my coat off when this guy launches in to the most graphic description of his “abuse” I could hear the tap tap tapping and squelchy sounds in the background and his breathing was getting heavier, I was wondering around turning the lights on switching the computers on, filling the kettle, all the while he was still hard at it “are you shocked” he said when he didn’t get a response from me, “no, I said I’m just making a cup of tea and ordering the sausage butties for my colleagues” he hung up on me! Waste of time trying to shock me I’ve heard it all!
Bloody hell Abi , you had me choking with laughter over the squeaky bed noises. sorry my minded digressed to dirty thoughts. I did needed that giggle Thank you. hell yes with bells on to a birthday party so would love to meet you all, I really need something to look forward too. Been struggling for months ,the love of my life my husband is not well hasn’t been since he was a twat and got the 2nd shot ( long story but he knows now I was right which doesn’t help) but anyway he been back and forth to see doctors and the optician about his eyes and headaches to be told it’s his age and it will improve apparently he has some gel like stuff floating around back of his eye. Well my husband is only 54 . Never had an issue until he was a twat. It’s not getting better it’s getting worse. Then throw in the every day crap and kids etc etc and other family members being sick. Me being told by friends am a tin hat nutter. So yes party would be good . Wish you all a wonderful weekend. Much love to you all ❤️❤️
Thank you Trudi, sorry for the late reply. I’ve had to take some time out, to re-charge the 3 years have been awful for so many and it can be so overwhelming. Myself and family have gone through so much when you start to think about it’s heartbreaking. What it’s done to my kids, my brother trying to kill him self in lockdown , my husband vax injuries, being told all the time am a nutter , losing friends etc. then you see what other are you going through, well it just gets so much at time. I could go on and on. But am feeling strong and better. Hope you are ok? looking forward to meeting everyone in person. If it wasn’t for this group etc I would of lost it I think. Much love and thanks to all and Abi ❤️❤️
Abi and substack family, if we did a great wall of heroes, who would you put on it? Several names pop into my head including Abi, obviously, but who would you choose?
Ps I can’t believe none of you commented on Christopher Plummer being a complete hottie in the sound of music 🤷🏻♀️ The Captain would just have to blow that whistle and my clothes would fall off 😀
Abs I heard a joke yesterday it goes as follows,, MRS Brown appears in court and is found guilty of stealing a tin of peaches, The judge asks " Mrs Brown roughly how many peaches were in the tin you stole " Mrs Brown nervously replies 6 peaches I think sir ", The judge responds " I therefore sentence you to 6 weeks imprisonment, 1 week for each peach " Husband Mr Brown shouts from the back row " She nicked a tin of peas as well" 🤣 impressive spring impression Abs it took me back to my sofa bed days😂. Question, Abs living in London have you ever been asked directions by a foreigner and been tempted to respond in your glorious Italiano.
😂😂😂
Tom Harwood is the worse example of the younger generation. I really cannot listen to that soy boy.
Let’s hope that YouTube doesn’t take down The Great Wall of Cunts. I really like abirobertscomedydiva, it suits you.
June Slater is now into self promotion and is a Malhotra and Bridgen bootlicker.
An Abi birthday gathering, what a brilliant idea. PLEASE do not organise it between 13-24 June as I will be away on holiday. I don’t want to miss another event!
Yes Jan 👏👏👏 my thought exactly on JS, whilst doing self promotion on GB news😂😂
Bloody hell Abi, for a minute i thought you had kidnapped one of the chimps from nearby twycross zoo while you were down our way at kegworth l🤣🤣 even George the dog went mad barking lol! I find you get the best conversations whilst in the back of a taxi i have certainly been enlightened to some local goings on whilst travelling to work( i do miss that)
😂😂😂
Fabulous pod tonight Abi,
Your taxi driver sounds like a hoot🤣🤣. Bet he was telling all his cabbies that he had a miserable comedian in his cab🤣🤣
The trailer is looking good 👍
Planet of the apes is just brilliant, all of them. Makes me cry and I don’t like the nasty one 🥲
Terry had a good sense then about Alistair Stewart, bless him💙
Did I hear someone say ‘PARTAAAAAAAAAY🥳🥳🥳
It’s a hell yeah from me, I’m in Leicestershire, where’s everyone else? Poor Jules is way up in Scotland, but her and Mr Jules won’t miss this🎉🎉🥳
I’m staying in a hotel this time as not missing out on the late night shenanigans 😁😁😁
Bloody Nora, poor Charlotte will be run ragged again, that woman is remarkable 💖💕💖
Will there be cake? Asking for a friend😂🎂😂
Something to look forward too... Cannae wait!!
😁😁😁💖💕💖
Yes poor Charlotte but I think she loves it really and she’s so good at it. I met her at the London comedy thing. I want her as my live-in mate. Just dead normal, cuddly and down to earth. Love her. I turned round and saw Abi at the bar. I dived on her for a hug and wanted to touch her fluffy hair but I think that might’ve been too much 😆
😂😂😂
😂
Asking for a friend 🤣
😂😂😂you better be coming 👍
Trudi, “will there be cake”? 😂😂 Get your priorities right darling😂😂
😂😂😂😂
I wish I lived near London. I live in the US. I would love to hang out with this community for an evening. But maybe if it’s in June we have time to renew my passport.
Yes I’d love to have some US representatives at the Abi Daily extravaganza 🇺🇸🙏
Great! I would love to be there for it.
Love a Planet of the Apes especially the new ones. ...the old ones creep me out a bit.
The taxi driver sounds like a belter.....pissing myself at ‘I won’t be using it’.
Alastair Stewart,a nod to Terry on the GWOC....nice.
June Slater......brilliant,loving the ‘you’re off the rails’ what’s app msg I’ve experienced this particular slur and I think it’s code for ‘ you are far smarter,funnier and much braver than me’ ,(well that’s how I translate it) from my padded cell).
Birthday meet up sounds fab....we’ve been talking about it for the full gestation period of GWOC! It’s time we celebrated its birth and your birth Abi 😀
Love to you all....it’s difficult being off the bloody rails and still ‘part’ functioning in society xx
Alistair Stewart, just as sickening as Tom Harwood. Terry knew his stuff.
June Slater, you have summed her up perfectly Jules. I think the whole of the SubStack family must be off the rails in June-speak.
We are off our fucking trollies but in such a good way Jan 😂💕 and thank God for u all 🙏 xx
Yes Jules, we are all part of the best club you could imagine. Thank God we all found each other, thanks to Abi xx💖
Love your interpretation of 'you're off the rails!' I can go with that!
Hope Abi blocks the old bag on WhatsApp 😂
I remember how outspoken lord Sumpton was at the beginning, he came across as a highly principled man and very intelligent and then all of a sudden he sat down and kept his mouth shut. I remember how outspoken Peter Hitchens was, always posting Bob's amazing cartoons saying 'Bob gets it' then he said nothing in defence of Bob when he was hounded out of his job on the telegraph and being vilified on twitter. Hitchens write an article explaining why he took the jabs and was a lot more cautious about what he said afterwards. Neither of those two were consistent and they didn't defend people when it really mattered.
Would love to come to your birthday party Abi and meet everyone in the substack family, that would be wonderful.
Although i love good films, books seem to affect me more than films. My all time favourite is Nicholas Nickleby by Charles Dickens. Its an emotional roller coaster, very moving and all of humanity is in those pages. Compassion, love, cruelty, ignorance and in the end karma. You could relate to it today and at any time.
Your Italian accent is definitely better than your Greek one Abi 😉
Yes I agree lord Sumpon has disappeared. A good book I recommend is The ragged trousered philanthropists iwritten by Robert Tressel t's about builders in early 1890 working on a house of all different trades disgusting wht they don't have enough money to feed there family written in a humorous way.
I remember listening to him early on in the ‘pandemic’ (I can never say that with a straight face 😆) he was doing an interview about how we would all be forced to get jabbed and I felt so despondent. He knew it was wrong and yet said we should comply. Really, really depressed me.
Yes, I thought he had a bit more backbone than that. Really disappointing and he let a lot of people down who had respect for him.
Yes I've heard of that one Jane but not read it yet. Thanks.
Sounds interesting
Abi’s Italian accent is fab
Poor Bob 😔
Did u say BOB? 💕😀
Did your ears prick up then Jules?😂😂
Bob will have to pop along, you can smother him in cake and lick it off... I’ll be hunting out the cheese and pineapple hedgehogs. You think I’m joking 🧀🍍🦔
You’d have to get past me first!! I could lick cake off Bob all day 😂😋
Great laugh tonight Abi, loved the chimp impressions, I used to act out the PG Tips adverts in full when I was a kid (you’ve got to be old enough to know what what I mean) I loved those monkey and wanted one as a pet 🤣, obviously I loved the Planet of the Apes films too!
I saw The Peoples Princess June Slater on Twitter explaining why she doesn’t go to marches cos London is too far and she’s too busy helping people!!!! I bet she’d be there faster than a speeding bullet if GBeebies invited her to the studio. I’d love a June Slater type character, perhaps she could do an interview with McCockin I’m sure she’d love it!
I’m definitely up for a party Abi, I would love to see you and the substack family in person it would be fab!
Hope everyone is ok and having a great evening! x
She could be called Ruth Tyler as in roof tiler.. ( slater) 😂😂
What about June Shitfield?
Nice one Jules
😂😂😂
Yes, nice one 🤣
I like it Trudi, if she can’t pronounce the “th” in Ruth she could say Roof, I sometimes get called Caff instead of Cath!
Or perhaps she could be called April Maybe, because April and May come before June 🤣x
👏👏😂😂
The People’s Princess 😂
Nothing ‘princess’ about June Slater
Hello June, if you’re reading this👋👋😂😂😂
🤭🤭🤭
Loving the chimping 🐵 im also a huge fan of Planet of the apes. I would love to come to your party and definitely stay over. Would be amazing to meet the substack family x
It will be a glorious get together.
It will be fabulous to meet everyone 👍👏👏😁💖
Wish I could join you all for Abi’s birthday but I’ll be with you in spirit from South Africa. I couldn’t live without Abi’s daily pods - always thought provoking and inspiring.
You’ll definitely be with us all Sarah 👍💖
Another great podcast Abi perfect end to the day and loving everyone's comments too xx
Jesus Christ... just had a look for smutboy, hope it’s not the one I found, he was having a Tommy tank 👊💦🫣😳🤭🤭
My friend used to work in an old people’s home when she was 18. There was an old boy called Frank who would always be touching his todger under his blanket. Then he’d fling the blanket off and stand up and shout “finish me off” to the circle of little old ladies. My friend would be traumatised and they’d have staff meetings about what should be done about Frank the wank 😂
😂I had this experience when I was only in my teens working in a nursing home prior to starting my nurse training....I was horrified that men in their 80s were still standing to attention 😱 we had one like that,Ecky was his name,he was wheelchair bound,paralysed down his right side but his little erect walnut seemed to be in good working order,bless him and he’d shout for someone to finish him off,he even asked the Chef in one occasion 😂 I hadn’t seen many willies and I was traumatised 😀🤢
Boys will be boys, unless they are girls obviously!
I’ve had so many experiences with wankers I could write a book. Working for a sexual abuse support service we would often get phone calls from men who loved to phone up and pretend to be victims of abuse then go in to graphic detail of what was obviously a sexual fantasy. We had paid members of staff and volunteers who would work on the telephone helpline and they were told to hang up if these calls came through. I got a call one morning just as I’d opened up the office, I answered the phone immediately in case it was a genuine person needing help I hadn’t taken my coat off when this guy launches in to the most graphic description of his “abuse” I could hear the tap tap tapping and squelchy sounds in the background and his breathing was getting heavier, I was wondering around turning the lights on switching the computers on, filling the kettle, all the while he was still hard at it “are you shocked” he said when he didn’t get a response from me, “no, I said I’m just making a cup of tea and ordering the sausage butties for my colleagues” he hung up on me! Waste of time trying to shock me I’ve heard it all!
Not wondering around wandering around! Duh!
Crikey 🫣🤭
Oooh icky ecky 🤢
Poor old boy. If he’d done it in front of my grandma she’d have twatted him with her stick and shouted “yea dirty begger, get to confession!!”
😂🤣😂
Erect walnut😂😂😂I’m crying 😭😭😂🤣😂
I’ve just realised it’s Friday and that Abi might read some of these out....u started it Trudi with Smutboy or whatever he’s called 😀
You love it Jules... I bloody don’t, his rather large member was close up near the camera lens... 🍆🍆🤣🤣🤣
Oh dear lord!!😳😳🤭🤭😂😂
🤣🤣🤣
I feel violated 🫣🫣😂😂
Holy shit Trudi....😂😂😂
😂😂😂
Bloody hell Abi , you had me choking with laughter over the squeaky bed noises. sorry my minded digressed to dirty thoughts. I did needed that giggle Thank you. hell yes with bells on to a birthday party so would love to meet you all, I really need something to look forward too. Been struggling for months ,the love of my life my husband is not well hasn’t been since he was a twat and got the 2nd shot ( long story but he knows now I was right which doesn’t help) but anyway he been back and forth to see doctors and the optician about his eyes and headaches to be told it’s his age and it will improve apparently he has some gel like stuff floating around back of his eye. Well my husband is only 54 . Never had an issue until he was a twat. It’s not getting better it’s getting worse. Then throw in the every day crap and kids etc etc and other family members being sick. Me being told by friends am a tin hat nutter. So yes party would be good . Wish you all a wonderful weekend. Much love to you all ❤️❤️
That’s awful about your husband Sarah and I hope there’s some improvement for him and for you.
Yes, you must come to the bash, it will be great fun👍💕
Thank you Trudi, sorry for the late reply. I’ve had to take some time out, to re-charge the 3 years have been awful for so many and it can be so overwhelming. Myself and family have gone through so much when you start to think about it’s heartbreaking. What it’s done to my kids, my brother trying to kill him self in lockdown , my husband vax injuries, being told all the time am a nutter , losing friends etc. then you see what other are you going through, well it just gets so much at time. I could go on and on. But am feeling strong and better. Hope you are ok? looking forward to meeting everyone in person. If it wasn’t for this group etc I would of lost it I think. Much love and thanks to all and Abi ❤️❤️
Abi and substack family, if we did a great wall of heroes, who would you put on it? Several names pop into my head including Abi, obviously, but who would you choose?
This made me lol today. Abs you’re such a knob 😂 the chimp, columbo, the accents, the taxi driver. Much needed laugh.
I have a question for Ask Abi Anything. Have you ever been arrested? If so, what for? Or if not have you ever come close?
Ps I can’t believe none of you commented on Christopher Plummer being a complete hottie in the sound of music 🤷🏻♀️ The Captain would just have to blow that whistle and my clothes would fall off 😀
Christopher Plumber sorry Plummer? Sounds like you’d be happy for him to look up your back water spout eh Jules? Naughty girl 🤣
😂😂😂